my instincts

i hate it when my left i je yang kelip kelip.i know i'm gonna cry but i dunno because of wat and i totally hate it to wait for it.ouh lama nye nak balik lagi.i hate another to be precised 22mins to 6pm. i'm still waiting for his call.guess he's pretty busy.nak call takot.dah la mata kiri dok kelip kelip.dah anta sms.tapidia tak reply.mmg busy la gamaknye. adoi.. dah la aku terkontang kanting tatau apa plan malam nie,pukol brape plak dia nak amek aku.haiyo.i hate waiting.its like forever. can't it be fast?i don't know.. sometimes, i have this feeling of losing it. like there's no more sparks but truth is, i'm deep in love with him. it's just one of those days that u can't stand with each other needed your own space kinda thing. i need more friends.i need more activities. i totally can't wait to move out.i can go swimming every day.haaaa tak payah i have to susah susah go to gym.anyway, i want to log off now..kisses to everyone and happy merdeka!

the wanted wanting the wanter

last night was such a frustrating day for me.i went room hunting with danial. went to all the 7-eleven in section 14 & 17 to look at the notice board.might never know i got lucky. well, i saw this ad at www.klue.com.my classified. posted,

"Available 1st SEPTEMBER!! Ken Damansara, Block A, 6th floor. Location: Damansara Intan, near sec17 and SS2. Mater bedroom with air-con, attached bathroom with water heater = RM550. Small room with fan, shared bathroom, with water heater = RM300. Female house-mate. 1 month deposit only, rental exclusive of utilities. House partly furnish with kitchen cabinet, etc... PM me for contact number n details."

and so,i made the appointment to take a look. ouh my god..it's so frustrating somehow, living in a cell. its too small. but for RM300 it's kinda expensive and not worth it. so i went home with this frustrating feelings. The girl, Rou Xi, she said, she'll think about it about exchanging the room since i wanted the middle room. i told her i was willingly to pay about RM450.so she told me she'll give me a call tomoro which is today. i was totally frustrated when i think about it. so on the way to the office, as usual i hitched a ride with angah [my senior at mtdc.she's working at block C phileo dsara 1 too.].i told her how sad i am.so she told me ," the wanted wanting the wanter and the whole universe would conspirate to help u achieve it" its a quote from jalaludin rumi. a sufism poet.her idol. hehe..

this is what i chat with her after the good news.well part of it..she gave me an important advice..

zara322_g: i believe u babe.seriously
angah: yeah babe.. have faith!
angah: he also said that failure is the key to life
angah: coz it'll make u realize that ure depending on Him. and thats when miracles happen
angah: if we dont fail, God only teaches us to fly with one wing
angah: thats why failures are essential
angah: :D
angah: bila aku down, i always think that way
zara322_g: ouh ouh ouh important lesson of the day babe!!
zara322_g: thanks.many thanks..
zara322_g: :)
angah: takdahal la babe
angah: im happy for u
angah: coz nmpk sgt u really wanted this so bad
angah: and u got it
angah: wow
angah: seriously
zara322_g: exactly..tu ah..ko tatau aku melompat camne bile dpt msg dari rou xi.dia tulis .. "morning my dear. do u still interested to rent the medium room? i kind of like u actually should be nice to stay with you.." waahhhhh sapa tak happy
zara322_g: i tot she was just being nice je semlm when she said she'll call me if she change her mind to exchange room w me.
angah: heheheheheheheh
angah: what a luck, babe
angah: but nothing happens by chance
angah: ur fate has been written

so i guess...have faith in whatever you do.and keep on praying..you might never know when He'll answer your prayer. :)

menghapus jejakmu

l to r : ati,hafiz,moi+shauna @ UV Nation,One Utama 2007
[ kenangan lalu ... ]

Menghapus Jejakmu - Peterpan

Terus melangkah melupakanmu
Belah hati perhatikan sikapmu
Jalan pikiranmu buatku ragu
Tak mungkin ini tetap bertahan

Perlahan mimpi terasa mengganggu
Kucoba untuk terus menjauh
Perlahan hatiku terbelenggu
Kucoba untuk lanjutkan itu

Engkau bukanlah segalaku
Bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
Usai sudah semua berlalu
Biar hujan menghapus jejakmu

Terus melangkah melupakanmu
Belah hati perhatikan sikapmu
Jalan pikiranmu buatku ragu
Tak mungkin ini tetap bertahan

Perlahan mimpi terasa mengganggu
Kucoba untuk terus menjauh
Perlahan hatiku terbelenggu
Kucoba untuk lanjutkan itu

Engkau bukanlah segalaku
Bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
Usai sudah semua berlalu
Biar hujan menghapus jejakmu

Lepaskan segalanya
Lepaskan segalanya

Engkau bukanlah segalaku
Bukan tempat tuk hentikan langkahku
Usai sudah semua berlalu
Biar hujan menghapus jejakmu

Nanananana
Nanananana
Nanananana
Nnananana
Nanananana
Nanananana

lagu nie kene sangat.. hari nie 29/08/2007 birthday ati.my "bestfriend" of 14 years. we're no longer friends now. it's been 4 months we haven't been talking to each other. actually, i totally forgot it's her birthday. i never forget her birthday. guess this is it. memang betul aku menghapus jejak mereka dari hidup aku. sedey? bohong la kalau aku tak sedey. tapi aku rasa, i'm used to it already. not having them around. kata dah 4 bulan. i wish them all the best in their life. i'm happy with what i have right now. insyaAllah i'll improve to a better life than this. insyaAllah... i'm wishing,hoping and praying that danial will be by my side all the way..not just him..the rest of my friends. REAL friends. they know who they are. i'm glad to know you guys are still around. i love you guys. kisses~

chentaKu..

ouh how i miss my baby so much..we're almost 6 months together [i sooo can't believe it!] and i'm lucky to have him. he's my heart and soul now. he's been a very supportive boyfriend and a very normal one! hahaha.. finally.. i'm so happy being with him. i miss you baby~ thank god i've found you...

i'm falling in love all over again and i cannot imagine what it means. i cannot understand the hand life has dealt me, the timing of its appearance, or the possibility of what it means. i cannot understand this, nor do i pretend to.i find i have been blessed with a wonderful chance- a chance to open my heart up again to someone who means more to me than anything i know. i do not know how the course of time conspired to bring me this chance to pass, nor do i care. all i know is that i have been presented with a rare and fantastic opportunity, and that i cannot allow it to pass me by. for one whom lives in the past will allow the future to pass them by. i am scared, however. i am scared because i do not know what will come of this. i am scared because i do not know what will happen if i open my heart back up. i am scared because i am unable to fathom what this relationship could mean for me. i am scared because the last time i opened my heart up i ended up being hurt. i ended up being hurt and i do not want to endure that pain again but i am willing to take that chance. i will take the chance because of him. i will take the chance because he means more to me than anything i know. i may be scared, but i do not want to lose him, and i will open my heart up to him. for i find in him an inexhaustible beauty, an unfathomable grace, and the infinite wonder of a man who has brought me back into the world, and shown me what it is to be loved once more. he has changed me, and for that i am thankful. he has awakened in me emotions i once thought dead, and he has given me such joy that i shall never be able to repay him.

I've fallen in love all over again. thanks to u ..

this love...

This love
This love is a strange love
In that it can lift a love
This love

This love
I think I'm gonna fall again
And ever when you held the hand
And turn 'em in your fingers, love

This love
Now rehearsed we stay, love
Doesn't know it is love
This love

This love
Doesn't have to feel love
Doesn't care to be love
It doesn't mean a thing
This love

This love loves love
It's a strange love, strange love

This love
This love
This love is a strange love, strange love
I'm gonna fall again love
Doesn't mean a thing
Think I'm gonna fall again
This Love

this song is deep.very meaningful to me.it is a strange love.. my heart kept on questioning..

wonderful moments

sometimes, i kept on wondering.why on earth i meet up again with all my old friends.the people i havent herd for ages fr example, sis, may, anyz, kak tasya, omar, oza, fid and many more..but now i know.to fill up the empty slots. these people used to be closed to me and i left them or few of them left me too. God's giving us a second chance to make it up. i really enjoy it sumhow.having them around me. catching up. remembering those old days. just keep us alive. and i hope this frienship last long not like what i've been through. i'd like to thank all of them for coming back into my life and color it up with wonderful moments.i love you guys~

Zara D.

secret love

Swizz beats, ladies and gentlemen (come on, come on, come on)
Ladies and gentlemen (Mariah, Mariah)
Ladies and gentlemen
As we go a little somethin' like this
Hit it!

[Mariah]
Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it between us
You and me got a secret love, baby

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it on the hush
You're not mine, got a secret love, baby

It was a summers day
When walking by
She didn't notice as
As you turned and you discreetly winked your eye
And I remember you from back in the day
You were the boy I couldn't breathe without
The one that got away

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it between us
You and me got a secret love, baby (secret love)

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it on the hush
You're not mine, got a secret love, baby (you're not mine)

Oh, now that I found you, I cannot let you go
You know I got my man at home
But baby, I still need you so
And I know you ain't never leaving that girl
But everytime you touch me, baby, it feels so incredible

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby (oh baby)
But keep it between us
You and me got a secret love, baby (you and me)

Oh baby, oh baby (oh baby)
Come give it to me now, baby (come on and give it to me, boy)
But keep it on the hush
You're not mine, got a secret love, baby

Breakdown

Secret lovers, yeah

You and me, you and me, you and me, baby

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it between us (keep it on the hush)
You and me got a secret love, baby

Oh baby, oh baby
Come give it to me now, baby
But keep it on the hush (but keep it)
You're not mine got a secret love, baby

Baby, baby, baby
Come give it to me, baby
We got a secret love, darling
Keep it between us, baby


when i read it again..i just smiled.but i actually love the song.the lyrics.superb.thats when i noticed what the song is actually all about.hahaha~ whoever are having an affair.u can dedicate this song.hahaha~

can't you see

things aren't going so well over the weekends. i had too many tots. i canceled my meetings with oza.my sis aren't talking to me still and i was having one of "those" days with danial. i am so tired now. sometimes, i just wish i don't have to go through all this.i just want to forget things and go far away from here. guess it won't happen cause i can't run away from these situations. this is part of life.without it,it'll be meaningless. i miss happy moments.that's all i could blog for now. i'll blog soon. i'm just really tired.

me blogging?

bie,
u know i dun blog much unless if i feel like to.to tell u d truth,i dun blog much.myspace was sum certain things i feel like writing.trust me.other than dat,its mostly in my heart.my head.my soul. til d day i die. and u wont be getting it out from me.insyaAllah tidak. =) so basically,u didnt win at all n neither do i.this is coz, i hv diaries everywhere.not just on net.okie dokie?taa~